Allow me to preface this post by saying that I am obsessed with dog shows (almost as much as with Mormons). I make no apologies for it. I am not ashamed of it. It is part of who I am. Last night, I watched the "National Championship" Eukanuba Cup on Animal Planet. I cannot wait until I have a place of my own so that I can have a dog.
Since I am in dog show mode today, I think I'll give you some little-known facts about dog shows:
First (I am not making this up), you have the ball-grab. Dog shows started because wealthy dog owners wanted to find the best specimens of their particular breeds, so that they could mate those dogs with their own and enhance the performance of the breed. So when judging a male dog, the judge must grab the testicles to make sure that they are intact and that the dog is able to breed. You have to wonder about someone that gets excited about this job...
Next, it is apparently a requirement for female dog show judges to wear skirt suits. And not just any skirt suits, either. They must be formal, ankle-length, and the sportcoat must have Bea Arthur style shoulder pads and as many beads and sequins as possible. In fact, I believe that the rating system for judges of dog shows is based on how many shiny things you can attach to your clothing.
Finally, black tie is always optional. When the camera pans out into the crowd, you see a motley crew of spectators. Many are wearing the finest tuxedos and evening gowns (with beads and sequins of course) money can buy. These are the owners of the dogs. Then behind them, you have the rabble that just walked in off the street wearing coveralls and NASCAR T-shirts because they missed the tractor pull and wanted to take advantage of their rain-check tickets.
Since I am in dog show mode today, I think I'll give you some little-known facts about dog shows:
First (I am not making this up), you have the ball-grab. Dog shows started because wealthy dog owners wanted to find the best specimens of their particular breeds, so that they could mate those dogs with their own and enhance the performance of the breed. So when judging a male dog, the judge must grab the testicles to make sure that they are intact and that the dog is able to breed. You have to wonder about someone that gets excited about this job...
Next, it is apparently a requirement for female dog show judges to wear skirt suits. And not just any skirt suits, either. They must be formal, ankle-length, and the sportcoat must have Bea Arthur style shoulder pads and as many beads and sequins as possible. In fact, I believe that the rating system for judges of dog shows is based on how many shiny things you can attach to your clothing.
Finally, black tie is always optional. When the camera pans out into the crowd, you see a motley crew of spectators. Many are wearing the finest tuxedos and evening gowns (with beads and sequins of course) money can buy. These are the owners of the dogs. Then behind them, you have the rabble that just walked in off the street wearing coveralls and NASCAR T-shirts because they missed the tractor pull and wanted to take advantage of their rain-check tickets.
Candidates for funniest breed name: Bracco Italiano, Petit Basset Griffon Vendeen, Affenpinscher, Hovawart, Mexican Hairless
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