Well, this snowy Thursday is a pretty slow news day, except for deaths and natural disasters. And I am not a completely evil human being, so I'm not going to make fun of that. But here are a couple of attempts at levity this morning.
First, the country may be looking to Utah for it's new healthcare policy. Now, I'm no expert of matters of national healthcare, far from it. But I do have to say that I find it difficult to believe that no one in the government sees the truth behind this so-called revolutionary model of public healthcare. Clearly, it is a plot by our old friends the Mormons. I don't know if you know this, but some Mormons actually have a term for running state-run programs into the ground. It's called "bleeding the beast." Numbers have been declining in this country for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and they need a new gimmick. All I'm saying is that if this goes national, we are going to have healthy Mormons running around everywhere, and they will take over. Think about it.
Next, for the love all that is holy; can we go one day without seeing Paris Hilton's emaciated face on our television screens? I mean, I can't, but that's because I bought a copy of that video that got released a couple years ago. But honestly, she's just not a quality human being. And her cell phone got hacked into and all her little rich-and-beautiful twit friends have their information spread around on the internet. Now they all have to get their significantly underpaid personal assistants to run down to the Verizon store and get new numbers. "I don't know why this stuff always happens to me," said Hilton. Because you're a f*cking idiot, that's why! Why can't some people just stop being popular?
Finally, this isn't really a news story, but it's a great image. This comes from President Bush's trip to Slovakia this week. I am friends with a couple of Slovaks, and they are wonderful people, but I would never do this upon first meeting. I wonder how Laura feels about this:
Bush in Slovakia 
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